Getting to Know Your Protector

What you're doing and why

This practice is to get to know a protector part of you that came up in one of our sessions.

It will help you find it in your body, ask it some questions, and listen for what comes back. The aim isn't to fix anything, it's to build a relationship with this part of you so it’s not so alone and doesn't need to work so hard.

Before You Begin

  • You'll need about 15 - 25 minutes for this practice. Find somewhere quiet where you won't be interrupted.

  • Choose your focus. Choose the protector you will focus on

  • Think of a recent moment when this protector part showed up. You don't need to write this down. Just have a specific situation in mind, you'll use it at the start of the meditation.

Guide to making this meditation effective

Approach this part of you with genuine curiosity.
This works much better if you treat it like a person you're trying to understand. It can tell the difference between curiosity and judgement. You don't need to like the habit. You just need to be willing to hear what it has to say.

Ask the questions and listen — don't analyse.
I'll guide you to ask questions to the part of you that drives this old habit. Just ask internally and notice what comes back. Think of it like dropping a pebble into still water and watching the ripples. You might get a word, an image, a feeling, a sensation — or nothing at all.

If nothing comes, stay with the sensation in your body until the next question.
I'll sometimes offer the same question twice in different words. If neither version lands, let it go.

You don't need to follow the whole meditation.
Wherever you get to is enough. You're building a relationship with this part of you, it doesn't all need to happen in one sitting.

If emotions come up, let them.
Tears, sadness, grief, anger, these are a normal part of the process and often a sign that something meaningful is being reached. If at any point it feels like too much, open your eyes, feel your feet on the floor, and take a few breaths before deciding whether to continue or stop.

Last word before you start

This meditation has two parts to it.
Part 1 is 12min
Part 2 is 13mins

You can do part 1 + journal and then do part 2 + journal.
Or
Do part 1 and go directly to part 2 and only journal at the end.

Part 1 - Guided Meditation

In this guided meditation, you'll find the protector in your body, make contact with it, and begin to understand what it's doing for you and what it's afraid would happen if it stopped.

Sometimes I use the term old habit, this is referring to your protector.

Part 1 — Journaling prompts

Take a few minutes to write down what you noticed.

  • Where did you feel this protector in your body? What did it feel like, any shape, size, texture, temperature?

  • What did you sense about what this part is trying to do for you? How is it trying to help?

  • What did you sense it's afraid would happen if it stopped doing its job?

  • How do you feel toward this protector now, having spent time with it?

  • Was there anything that surprised you?

Part 2 - Guided Meditation - The Origin Story

In this part, you'll go deeper, learning when this protector first started its job, seeing who you were back then, and discovering how it helped you back then.

Sometimes I use the term old habit, this is referring to your protector.

Part 2 — Journaling prompts

  • When did this protector first show up? What age or time in your life came through?

  • What was happening back then that made this part need to step in?

  • When you looked at your younger self from where you are now, what did you feel?

  • Did any appreciation or warmth arise toward this protector? What was that like? If it didn't come, just note where you're at — that's honest and useful too.

  • When you asked the protector how old it thinks you are, what answer came back?

  • Did anything shift when you showed it your life today?

  • How does your body feel right now compared to when you started?

After you complete this

You can come back and do this practice again for your other capacity whenever you're ready. You can also repeat it for the same protector, the relationship deepens each time you visit.

If something felt unfinished or a strong emotion came up that didn't fully settle, that's not a sign something went wrong. It means something important is there. Bring it to the next session and we can work with it together.

I have also included another optional practice below.

Draw or Visualize the Part

  1. Sit quietly and bring to mind the part you worked with in session.

  2. Ask: “If this part had a shape, color, or image, what would it look like?”

  3. Using pen, markers, or whatever you have, draw what comes up — no artistic skill needed.

  4. You can label the drawing with a name or emotion (e.g., “The Protector” or “Worried One”).

  5. As you draw, stay curious. Notice what you feel toward the part. If there’s judgment, see if another part might be present, and gently ask it to step back so you can relate from Self.

📌 Keep the drawing somewhere you’ll see it — as a reminder of the relationship you’re building.